Hello once again, and a warm welcome to another edition of Coalface.

Every month is Mental Health Month, but June holds a special significance as Men's Mental Health Month. This is the perfect time to confront the version of yourself that struggles with self-doubt. Imagine waking up tomorrow to a life where everything feels perfect—what would that look like for you?

Let’s delve into the topic of trauma. Trauma loads the gun, while our coping mechanisms pull the trigger. The good news is that you are doing better than you realise. Why? Because you are doing the best you can, when you can. As a former police officer and soldier, I understand all too well the debilitating effects trauma can have on the mind, body, and spirit. This Men's Mental Health Month, I want to share my thoughts on resilience, acceptance, and connection.

**Resilience**—that old chestnut. It’s a concept that is frequently misunderstood and easily marketed. Many confuse resilience with adaptation. While we need adaptation to foster resilience, resilience itself is not simply about adapting. For instance, if the language of your inner dialogue is ignorance, thereby creating barriers to understanding, you may find yourself resorting to dishonesty and avoidance just to cope. It’s important to recognise that we can only truly demonstrate resilience, or even understand our limits, when we are under stress. The key is to unite our thoughts, feelings, and behaviours with purposeful outcomes, especially during those challenging times.

**Acceptance** opens the door to kindness. Acceptance of ourselves and others nurtures a deeper understanding, which in turn cultivates compassion and kindness. I recall a moment when I sat beside someone in distress and said, “I’m here to help you cry.” Interestingly, the act of crying can often reduce the urge to drink. Essentially, the more you cry, the less you drink. Tears are simply your eyes’ way of talking.

Now, let’s talk about **connection**. What does connection mean to you? On a scale of 1 to 10—1 being the lowest and 10 being perfection—how connected do you feel to yourself, your family, friends, goals, values, and morals? It’s our responsibility to positively influence the world around us. As fathers, brothers, and uncles, we have the opportunity to pass on valuable lessons to future generations. To put it bluntly: face your demons, or they may end up raising your children.

As men, we have a unique opportunity to embrace Mental Health Month, to grow and learn. Let's take the time to better understand ourselves, practice kindness and acceptance. I encourage you all to learn from those who are making positive changes in their lives. Let’s take this journey together.